oh, to be able to afford pomegranate juice

Sometimes I really hate being broke. Usually I can just deal with it, but lately it has been my numero uno cause of stress. Especially since I finally caved in and went to see a chiropractor, who so nicely informed me that I am completely out of whack. She is suggesting I see her 3 times a week for a month, and then drop down to 2 times a week for a bit, then once per week, and then finally once each month. Although I don't deny I need it, I can't afford it. So what's a girl to do? I haven't had a single headache since I started chiro. That is pretty spectacular. On top of it all, I keep seeing pomegranate juice in the grocery store, and I have heard so much about it's amazing nutritional properties, I feel I must try it....but at $5 for a teenie weenie bottle, I'm not going to be trying it any time soon!

Which leads me to the next thing. I need advice. I recently applied for a job. It is not a step up for me by any stretch of the imagination, but it pays significantly more (I'm talking about $9/hour more) and offers benefits. Plus, it involves lots of travel all over Alberta and BC. Since we all know how much I love airports, hotels, and roadtrips, this sounds like heaven to me. Well, I asked my superior at work to be a reference for me, which she agreed to. Then, completely out of the blue, I get called in to our office manager's office, and she tells me that they really, really don't want me to leave, and offered to up my salary, possibly give me benefits, etc. Now I feel this incredible sense of loyalty to my current place of work. They go out of there way to accomidate me, I would feel awful to leave them. But if I were offered this other position, it has some other benefits that would make me sooooo happy, and give me the opportunity to do some things for me that I have been denying myself, like lots of alone time, like my long walks, like learning a second language. What else would I do out in the middle of nowhere, in a hotel, for weeks at a time? I just don't know what to do.

I am not in the proper mental space right now to be going gung-ho for a top-notch epi job. This I know for sure. I still need to finish that damn thesis (and I am actually making terrific progress and suspect that it will be done by the end of the month), and on top of that, since I have been neglecting myself for quite some time, I need to get my body and my health and my emotional well-being back on track. I know that I will be much, much, much more successful at whatever I do (especially if it means moving to another city or going overseas) if I get stronger in these areas.

I started Ashtanga yoga last week and I absolutely loved it. The teacher is amazing, the room we do it in is amazing, my classmates are all wonderful. I felt like I belonged there, and was surrounded by like-minded people. That alone was a huge thing for me. I have found lately that I have been surrounded by people who don't think the same way I do, who don't have the same goals and values as me. I feel like I could spend hours trying to tell them where I'm at, and they just wouldn't understand. I overheard a conversation between two women at yoga, and craved to be a part of it, because they were articulating my thoughts perfectly. How sad is that???

I am sick. Again. I just got over the flu, which was horrible. I had a whole day of being somewhat energetic, and then I got a bad cold which turned into a nasty antibiotic-requiring infection in my ears, throat, and lungs. When will it end? I hate being sick. It's boring. There's only so much resting a person can do!